Brain Power – Video Challenges Your Beliefs
What would you do (or be) if you knew you could not fail?
That question changes things – doesn’t it? It kinda complicates your thinking process and makes you focus on what you really want – that’s scary.
Besides, most people don’t know “what they want”. They are too focused on what they “don’t want”.
- I don’t want to be poor.
- I don’t want to be disrespected.
- I don’t want to be in debt.
- I don’t want to be fat.
- I don’t want to go to work.
Would you dare to pursue your dream if it meant leaving the comfort of mediocrity?
You cannot improve yourself and stay the same. What will you choose? And the choice is up to you.
Until you accept the idea that you are responsible for your life – nothing will ever change. No amount of wishing and hoping or dreaming will change a thing. Change is the result of decision that is acted upon.
Decide what you want – then get busy.
Would you dare to have more than your friends?
The quick and easy answer is yes, but it’s really not so simple. You’ve got a lot of time and energy invested in your friendships. Are you willing to jeapardize that?
Growth changes a person (so many people overlook this obvious fact), which can scare others. Plus it can make them uncomfortable because they have to ask themselves why and how you were able to achieve your “new” accomplishments. I mean you’re the same person, right?
Here’s a thought – your income is the average of your five closest friends and associates. Test it for yourself.
Who determines what is possible?
This is an easy question. The answer is everyone but you. Right?
- You can’t help your lot in life.
- You don’t have an education.
- You’re not smart enough.
- You don’t have the time.
- You don’t know where to start.
- You don’t have the “connections”.
We see what we believe is possible
You’ve probably heard the phrase “I’ll believe it when I see it”. That’s not true. We “see” what we believe. If we don’t think a thing is possible, then we won’t believe it – even when we do see it.
Our perception clouds and determines our reality. As long as you limit yourself with outdated ideas and beliefs, you will never see (or be) anything new.
Keith Barry will make you question what is possible.
What do you believe is possible for you and your life?
Tags: Brain+Power, mediocrity, change
Three reasons why we never reach our potential level of success
1. We deny that we have any potential
(photo by LabGP & SigOther’s)
No one expects you to do anything that you are not capable of. Right? Just convince everyone that you are currently performing at your maximum level of ability. After you’ve done that, you just coast.
The problem is that maintaining this facade can be difficult when circumstances cause you to rise above the level of mediocrity. In times of:
- great need – you find another income source so that you can purchase something that you desire
- urgency – you do more in less time when there is a time component
- catastrophe – you rise to high levels of performance when the situation leaves you no choice
- personal desire – you become more efficient and productive so that you can leave early for vacation
2. Procrastination – The I’ll do it tomorrow syndrome
There’s always plenty of time. Right? No!
- There is a limit to the time that you have available
- There is a limit to the amount of time that you will be able to perform at high levels
Time is the one resource that is limited – you only get a certain amount
Here is something to think about. The things that you do today will determine your tomorrow. How can you expect an extraordinary future when you keep doing average things today?
Today is yesterday’s tomorrow.
- Is today remarkably different than yesterday?
- Do you expect tomorrow to be different than today?
- Why do you think tomorrow will be different than today if you keep putting off doing the things that can change your future?
3. Fear
(photo by Violator3)
Let’s face it – it’s scary if you stray too far from the herd of mediocrity. The great mass of commonness, sameness and in-the-box thinking is:
- where all our friends are
- feels safe
- easy – almost like no effort at all
- comfortable
- easy, easy, easy
Animals that stay together in herds do so because there is safety in large numbers.
- It is more difficult for predators to pick out an individual target.
- Weaker animals can be moved to the center of the herd and protected.
Do you need to be protected from success? Are you too weak to be successful? You’ll never find out until you separate yourself from the status quo.
Success is in the little details
I am a detail guy – they are important to me. Maybe it’s because I used to restore, build and paint custom cars. People (especially relatives) would see the car that I happened to be working on at the time and ask me how much I would charge them to paint their cars. They were always “surprised” by what seemed to them, to be an exorbitant amount. The reality is that I was probably a little low.
(photo by starmist1)
Your attention to “little” details is revealing
People think that a great paint job is in how well you apply the paint – they are wrong. Don’t misunderstand me, applying the paint is important, but it’s only important if all the preceding steps to having a great paint job have been properly done.
It doesn’t matter how well you apply the paint if:
- all the dents and dings have not been removed
- the underlying primer coats have not been sanded to “baby butt” smoothness
- you have used chemicals that are not compatible
My point is that people judge you by your attention to the details.
Crappy customer service is the result of poor attention to detail
The Rotater is rolling. On February 11, the Birmingham News ran an article entitled “Industrial Mechanic invents tool to improve shoulder mobility, finds niche in athletics”. This article drove massive traffic to the Rotater website and our blog, Shoulder Performance & Rehab and resulted in a huge number of orders for the Rotater.
Great – right? Yes and no! The traffic and orders were great – our blog crashing was not. I wrote about it in “The Good Stuff, the Bad Stuff and the Other Stuff”. Well, guess what? It happened again, twice this week. At least this time, I did not spend two days trying to figure out what the problem was.
I called customer service and waited on hold for about an hour. I didn’t get too worked up, because I put the phone on speaker and spent the time searching for a new host.
When someone finally answered the phone, I told her the problem expecting it to be corrected right away – I was in for a fight. This company’s situation is so bad, that they have resorted to having a “front line” person screen technical support issues. Essentially her job was to find out what I wanted and then she would prioritize and have technical support get back in touch with me.
I told her that this solution was not acceptable.
- She stalled – I didn’t budge.
- I asked to speak to her boss. He/she was not there.
- I asked to speak with technical support – they were busy.
- I asked to speak to “anyone” other than her – she put me on hold.
- I threatened to change hosts – technical support came on the phone.
The Rotater article is picked up on the newswire
The article that I mentioned above, was picked up by the Ann Arbor News and ran this week under a different title – “Rotater Cuff Injuries Inspire Invention”. (I have not been able to find a link to the article, but I have seen a copy of the article.)
The result – more traffic, more orders and more down-time for the blog. My problem is that I don’t want to alert our current hosting service to this third assault on our blog, because they informed me when I had it reset the second time, that if it happened a third time – they would suspend our account. Because we are exclusively a web-based business, this would put us “out of business”.
Solution: Pay attention to the “little” details
I have found a new host and am in the process of moving our website and blog. It is slow, tedious, time-consuming and scary, but hopefully all will be finished by this weekend.
I started this post talking about “attention to detail”. People noticed my paint jobs as a result of my attention to the details. Your success or lack of success is the result of your attention to the details. Let me try to explain.
The Rotater is a marvelous shoulder rehabilitation and stretching device – invented by an industrial mechanic – with a very southern accent. Not exactly where you would expect a revolutionary piece of medical / athletic training equipment to come from. But when people come to our website, they don’t see a bunch of hype.
- We tell them what the Rotater does
- We show a video demonstrating how the Rotater works
- We provide links to exercises that they can down-load and show to their doctors and therapists
- We provide real testimonials of real people, real doctors, real athletes / trainers and real physical therapists
- We include links to publications who are noticing the Rotater ( we’ve been in business since August 2007 and have been published eight times – and more is to come)
People who visit the Rotater website don’t know me or Scott, so we’re very careful to pay attention to the details:
- We answer every email – as quickly as possible
- We return phone calls – every time
- We deal with any issues – right away
- We don’t try to sell to every person – the Rotater won’t help everyone
- If someone is not happy – we refund their money (out of thousands, we have had two Rotaters returned)
People learn about you because of your attention to detail. Here is the take home message – There are no small details, everything counts and someone is paying attention to how you handle every situation.
It’s the small stuff that has the greatest return on you investment. Make it a point to pay attention to the details – Hey it works for Nordstrom (they are legendary for customer service) and it’ll work for you.
Develop your mental muscle for increased quality of life now and in the future
You are unique and you possess unique traits and abilities. One of those traits is the capacity to learn – right up the the point of death. This is wonderful – if you take advantage and harness your ability to learn. Though your capacity to learn does not diminish, for most, the desire to learn does. The large majority just doesn’t want to make the effort.
The result: instead of reaping the benefits and power of our unique ability (learning capacity), most people are content to have just enough to “get by”. Mediocrity is the rule.
Instead of living up to our potential by focusing our talents where they can do the most good for:
- ourselves – in the form of financial prosperity
- society in general – in the form of influence, wealth creation and economic stimulation
…we are satisfied to languish along side the rest of the herd.
This herd mentality, the desire to be like everybody else, does more to hold us back than anything else. We must realize that if we are to rise to our potential, then we must separate ourselves from the rest of the herd. To fulfill your potential and open the doors to possibility, requires both the desire to be more than you are right now and the conscious effort to learn how to be more. To be the person you are destined to be requires you to:
1. Desire to learn
If you are content, then you will not change. You will not see or feel the need to change. It’s only when discomfort replaces contentment that we consider changing something in our lives. It is when our clothes begin to get a little tighter that we begin to think about losing the slowly added weight. Here’s a thought that should make you very uncomfortable:
“…Every 8 seconds a Baby Boomer turns 50. According to a recent MetLife Foundation survey, Americans over the age of 55 fear Alzheimer’s more than any other disease besides cancer. But researchers no longer accept the notion that memory loss is inevitable. Instead, they urge senior citizens to exercise their minds.” (this is excerpted from Time magazine – Read the entire article)
You must become uncomfortable with the fact that you are not living up to your potential – if you are not. The fact that only a small percentage of our population (3–5%) ever reach financial independence is evidence that everyone cannot be reaching their potential since we live in a world of abundance and the same opportunities are available to everyone. What we don’t realize is that these “successful few” are not blessed with any special abilities. They may have traits that make them different, but their abilities are the same as ours. Read the “Millionaire Mind” by Thomas Stanley.
One thing that does stand out in the successes of our world is that they have a tremendous desire to learn. The successful person understands that learning always results in growth:
- growth of opportunities
- growth of skills
- growth of net worth
In order to grow in your career or in your life, you must learn, otherwise you stagnate. Stagnation stinks – literally.
Does the term “neuroplasticity” mean anything to you? It should. Read Shae Hadden’s post “The Plastic Brain”. It may change your thoughts on life after middle age. You should also consider reading “How Thinking Can Change The Brain” by the Dalai Lama. One quote should be of particular interest to you die-hard “can’t-teach-an-old-dog-new-tricks” advocates:
“The Dalai Lama had put his finger on an emerging revolution in brain research. In the last decade of the 20th century, neuroscientists overthrew the dogma that the adult brain can’t change. To the contrary, its structure and activity can morph in response to experience, an ability called neuroplasticity. The discovery has led to promising new treatments for children with dyslexia and for stroke patients, among others.”
2. Be open-minded
Learning requires the study of new topics and ideas. If you have a “know-it-all” mentality, you will never be able to free your mind to be all it can be. Almost no issue is either black or white. Most issues are shades of gray. It is often our lack of understanding that causes us to act erroneously and irrationally on a given topic. Learn How to Exercise an Open Mind.
It is when we give up stereotypical thinking and absolutism, that we “free” our minds to expand. This inner growth and development leads to an outer growth and expression in our lives. It is because we open ourselves to possibility, that the possibility comes into existence for us.
Opening your mind exposes the opportunities and possibilities. Are these new opportunities? No, they have always existed, but due to “tunnel vision”, you could not see them. How many “narrow minded” people do you know who would be considered financially successful? I think that these terms are mutually exclusive. In order to succeed, you must be progressive in your thinking.
3. Expose yourself
You cannot learn in a vacuum. You must explore and expose yourself to ideas and concepts that are foreign to you.
During my college experience, I had a professor who had a profound impact on my life. He was instrumental in motivating me to become involved in a graduate teaching program which resulted in one of the most satisfying experiences of my life – teaching. I went through an intensive training program and became a qualified (and paid) lab instructor for a variety of the biology courses offered.
This great experience would never have taken place if I had been content to just go to class and “get my credit”. Due to his enthusiasm, passion for teaching and willingness to help, I approached him for advice. This simple step led to a tremendously successful and fulfilling experience for me.
Expose yourself to new possibilities. Take a chance and look at these videos of some of the great tech thinkers of our generation. You don’t have to agree with them, but listen to their input. You learn when you are exposed to new input.
4. Practice thinking
Surround yourself with great thinkers and practice thinking. Trade ideas. Debate and defend your closely held beliefs. Do they stand up to scrutiny and examination?
If you want to be a success, then you must associate with successful people – people who stimulate your thinking.
- Discussing the weather, what you watched on television or which sports team is number one is not mentally stimulating.
- Listening to the constant bitching and moaning of the negative “doom and gloom” nay sayers will not introduce you to new topics of discussion.
- Most people have their minds made up, they are just trying to make sure that you don’t stray to far from the herd.
Move away from these kind of people! Find a mentor or at the very least someone who you consider to be successful and spend some time talking to them. You will discover that their abilities are no different than everyone else’s. However, their attitudes are.
Practice bouncing your ideas off of someone who can and will help you. Don’t waste your time with someone in the herd who just wants to play catch – tossing the same, bland ideas back and forth.
5. Keep a daily journal
Ask yourself, “what did I learn today?” I am not talking about a listing of facts, but a chronicle of the lessons and ideals that you experienced that day. Record what and how you learned these new topics. The act of manually recording your new ideas will imprint the experience on your brain where it will remain.
We have all heard or read the writings and advice of both Mark Twain and Will Rogers. Both of these great writers simply recorded their journey through life and their experiences with the “common man” along the way. The result is that each of these men are considered to be great teachers and philosophers.
Keep a journal. Record your ideas and lessons for the day, then go back over them from time to time. You’ll be amazed.
Successful men and women:
- have a great desire to be more knowledgeable
- are open-minded in their thinking
- constantly expose themselves to new and different ideas
- surround themselves with “possibility” thinkers
- keep a daily journal
If you want to be successful, model success. Do the things that successful people do. It is really that simple.
Credits – blast-off photo used courtesy of NASA
Underdogs and entrepreneurs have “great hearts”
We all love stories about underdogs. This is how you can explain why movies like “Rocky”, “Rudy”, and “Hoosiers” do so well at the box office. There is something very inspiring about watching the “little guy” overcome adversity and go on to make a great showing of himself or herself. It is pure motivation!
I am inspired because the underdog has the one trait that cannot be taught – heart! This quality reveals itself in the following ways:
1. Underdogs and entrepreneurs are willing to do whatever is necessary.
Like the underdog, entrepreneurs understand that their success is a directly related to the amount of time they spend learning, training and developing their skills. Entrepreneurs know that in order for them to succeed, they alone are responsible. They do not wish to and cannot “pass the buck”.
- We (entrepreneurs) like to create. But creation is just a small part of the process of becoming successful. Most people can create, but few ever follow through with their ideas. In my experience, almost everyone has had a great idea. However, the comfort of mediocrity, the stability of the status quo or the fear of the unknown keeps so many people in their rut, that most of these great ideas never see the light of day.
- Entrepreneurs are devoted to learning. We do the research. We know that in order to succeed, we must arm ourselves with as much knowledge about our prospective business or idea as possible. This is a necessity because we are likely to have to explain to investors:
- what our idea is
- what the market outlook for our business or idea is
- whether any competitors exist and what their market share is
- why our idea is better than our competitors
- what our competitive advantage is
- If no business model exists for our new idea, we are willing to develop one. I am faced with this quandary right now. I am involved in the development of a great and unique idea. However, because it is unique, we have to develop a plan to implement it. The answers don’t just fall out of the sky. You have to work long hours, but you understand this and this willingness to do whatever is necessary is what coaches like to call having a “great heart”.
2. Underdogs and entrepreneurs don’t quit.
Like the underdog, entrepreneurs refuse to quit before acquiring their goals. Quitting is not in us. I have always been involved in athletics and as a result, I am a highly competitive person. It is part of who I am. In high school, I played football on a team that was not championship quality. Consequently, we lost more games than we won. I could see heads drop and eyes glaze over late it the games when we were behind. That was my first experience with people who did not have the heart of a champion. It was then and is now, an unfathomable idea to me. How do you just quit?
- Quitting becomes habit forming. My parents explained to me at an early age that quitting was not an option. If I signed up to participate in some event or sport then I was expected to fulfill my obligation. This quality was further instilled in me by my father who was a drill instructor in the Army. After I reached the age of about ten, during the summer months when I was out of school, my father would sometimes let me go to work with him. He would let me participate in physical training right beside grown men. I loved every minute of it. It was also the first time that I ever witnessed someone giving up during training. I did not like it then and I don’t like it now!
- Quitting sets a bad example. My daughters watch me. They want to know about Daddy’s “businesses”. They are almost five and seven. If I quit, what does that show my daughters?
- It’s O.K. to quit if things get hard?
- That I am frivolous and don’t take my obligations / commitments seriously?
Underdogs and entrepreneurs know that quitting never leads to winning. Don’t quit.
3. Underdogs and entrepreneurs believe that they can win.
I have a hard time explaining this concept to some people. There is this feeling that overcomes me and lets me know that I will accomplish any goal that I have set for myself. If you have read the book “The Secret”, then you have some kind of idea of what I am trying to say.
- I know that people and events are conspiring to help me reach my goals.
- I know deep inside that I am and I will be successful in all my endeavors. This self knowledge is an inner confidence that is not based on what I can do, but on what I am and that by believing in myself and others, my success is a foregone conclusion.
- I know that I attract to myself the things necessary for my success. If I need something, it will reveal itself to me.
- I know that I am a small part of a greater plan and I am willing to shoulder my part of the load.
- I know that I am successful and I will continue to be successful as long as I keep my priorities on helping others reach their goals.
Underdogs and entrepreneurs have great hearts. They are willing and able to work hard, they never, ever quit, and they know that their efforts will be rewarded. Be an underdog. Overcome your obstacles and reach your successes.
Mama’s commonsense approach to excellent interpersonal skills
Life is about interaction. With rare exception, everyone interacts on a daily basis. You deal with your family, bosses, subordinates, customers (clients, patients, readers, etc), coworkers, friends, enemies, strangers and more everyday.
How would you characterize these exchanges? Do you enjoy interacting with others? Do they enjoy interacting with you?
Here are a few ideas that I feel (and my Mama taught) are common sense solutions for many of the problems that we face when dealing with others.
1. Smile at everyone.
This is easy enough to do physically, but we have problems with the mental part. Why should I smile? I don’t feel like smiling.
- Smiling causes others to relax. In a potentially tense situation, your smile may lower everyones blood pressure enough so that problems can be handled rationally. Your smile may even allow your message to be more easily received. Think of how you brace yourself when someone approaches you with a scowl on their face. Are you relaxed or are you thinking, “Oh No, here comes trouble?”
- Smiling helps you relax. Consciously smiling actually changes your attitude. It sounds crazy, but it is a fact. I have discovered that when I am having “bad” or anxious thoughts, if I will stop and think of something that makes me smile, my anxiety level decreases significantly.
- The presence or absence of a smile is the FIRST thing that people notice about others. It tells others that you are friendly and mean no harm.
- Your smile almost always provokes others to smile and thus feel better and be easier to deal with.
- Hint: Smile with your entire face – allow your eyes to “smile” along with your mouth.
2. Your Mama taught you some “magic” words and phrases – use them!
From the time that each of my daughters were born, my wife and I have tried to impress on them the need to use certain words and phrases. We consistently encouraged them and explained why it’s important to use these “magic” words and phrases. As a result, my children are complimented regularly on their manners.
- “Thank You” – does this really need an explanation? Everyone likes to know that they are appreciated – Everyone. I don’t care if it is a waiter refilling your glass or your father giving you a new car. Take the time to say “thank you”. If you think you are too “big and important” to be bothered thanking everyone that does something for you, then you are not really “big and important”.
- “Your welcome” – a proper response to “thank you”. Yes, it is a simple acknowledgment, but necessary nonetheless. Do it.
- “Yes sir”, “Yes ma’am”, “No sir”, “No ma’am” – Old fashioned? Maybe, but mostly it shows respect. You can never expect others to respect you if you fail to demonstrate respect for them. Your demonstration of respect for others reveals your character. People watch and listen to you. You won’t fool them for long – Be respectful.
- “Please” – I don’t care whether you own the business, work in the shipping department or clean the toilets, using “please” will get you more (and more often) than not using it. People resent being ordered around and will usually respond quite readily to a “please.”
- “Excuse me” – Wait for a break in the conversation before interrupting. Need directions? Approach potential help with “excuse me” – works every time.
3. Look ‘em in the eye.
Nothing conveys the message, “you are not important to me”, faster than looking elsewhere when a person is talking to you. When conversing, people look at your eyes to gauge your response to what they are saying. If you are looking at them, then your eye to eye contact tells them that what they are saying is valuable, thus they are valuable to you.
If you want your popularity to increase, then “focus on being focused” on the people you converse with. I guarantee that you will be happily surprised at the result.
4. Stop interrupting.
Interrupting is like the verbal version of pushing someone out of your way so you can get where you are going. It makes you look like the playground bully – because in essence, that’s what you are. It tells others that you are “bigger” and “more important” than they are, so you deserve to be heard first. Worst of all, it’s really, really rude. You won’t gain allies by interrupting them.
5. Don’t “one-up” everyone.
Maybe your cousin does pitch for the San Diego Padres, but my son getting his first hit in little league is what’s important to me. What do you think that your need to “top” every story conveys? Insecurity? Neediness? It is not an attractive trait and it will inhibit your otherwise good attributes. Allow someone else to steal the show sometimes – even if your stories are better.
6. Listen, listen and listen.
The auditory version of making eye contact. People talk with you for a reason. They want to:
- make you aware of something
- explain something to you
- get your feedback
- warn you
- prepare you
- ask your advice
If you are not listening, then you will not hear the message. Sometimes the message is subtle, so you have to listen hard. Conversation is a two-way street. You talk and then you listen. If you are not listening, then you are not in the conversation. Save yourself and others some time. Go get a mirror and talk to it.
7. Initiate and invite conversation.
Take the time to meet and greet others. If you are the “boss”, there is nothing (NO OTHER THING!!!) that you can do, that will produce greater returns for what is invested. Stop and say “hi” to the people who work for you. Ask about their families. Make it a point to know about them or take the time to get to know them.
Again, it tells people that they have value. This is important. When people feel valuable, they act valuable. They do their jobs in a valuable way. The bottom line is that when they feel valuable, they increase your value.
It’s like having clean underwear on.
As I said in the beginning, this is all common sense. The sort of stuff your mama told you when you were a kid. It’s kind of like her always telling you to make sure you’re wearing clean underwear. Her thought was, you never know when you may have to go to the hospital so you want to have clean underwear on. It won’t prevent you from having to go to the hospital, but if you do go, you’ll be prepared.
Most of the time, how you interact with others is just plain, old common sense. Smile, look at them, listen to them, be respectful and show them that they have value. You never know when you might need the “other” person.
Keep your blog’s readers coming back with a little commentluv
I recently discovered a WordPress plugin that I really like – so far. It’s called commentluv.
A brief description of commentluv.
Basically, it works like this:
- A person, (who has their own blog) reads on of your blog articles.
- That blogger then leaves a comment on your site.
- The commentluv plugin then goes to the other bloggers blog and retrieves that bloggers latest post title and places it at the end of his/her comment as a link back to his/her site.
Sounds cool, huh? Want to see how it works? Go to my article Six Barriers to Successful Living and scroll down through the comments. At the bottom, you will see where MichelleVan has left a couple of comments since I have installed this plugin.
Example
-
- I loved this article because of the solutions. Nice work. I stumbled it. – off to digg it now.
MichelleVan’s last blog post..Subscribe to Divine Purpose -3 Ways to Stay in Touch
By MichelleVan on Jan 10, 2008 | Edit
- I loved this article because of the solutions. Nice work. I stumbled it. – off to digg it now.
Try the commentluv plugin for yourself
Leave me a comment and then watch and marvel at how well it works. Instant links.
Thanks to Andy Bailey at FiddyP
Thanks Andy for this fantastic plugin. I hope that this article sends a lot of traffic your way. You deserve it. Kudos!
Do you have what it takes to succeed?
To hear people talk, you would think that success is a mythological term – something that other people can get, have or acquire, but not themselves. Why not? Why can’t everyone succeed?
While we’re at it, let’s go ahead and admit that we are talking about financial success – that just-out-of-our-reach condition of financial security. The place where income exceeds expenses and results in a surplus of money that provides you with options like:
- driving the type of vehicle you would choose if money was not object
- vacationing when and where you want to
- providing your children with an education that is free of many of the public school distractions
- becoming involved in the community
- living in the neighborhood / city / country of your choice
- sharing your skills
Do you have what it takes to be successful? Ask yourself the following questions, be honest and then decide if you have what it takes.
1. Are you a self-starter?
Successful people take the bull by the horns. They:
- get to work on time (but early is better)
- volunteer to take on the “hard” jobs
- don’t give a crap what everyone else thinks about their desire to “get ahead”
- produce well developed ideas and the plans for implementing them
- don’t stand around the shop / water cooler / coffee machine wasting time discussing their latest dating escapades, the current “hot” sitcom, plans for the weekend or the latest office / shop gossip
- pay attention and they take notes – lots of notes
- are focused on achieving the goal or objective
2. Are you a visionary?
Successful people have a vision and they project a mental picture of the future they desire. When you create a vision of what you want, you automatically begin to formulate the plans to make your vision happen
The difference between the “average joe” and those who acquire financial security is that:
- for the “average joe” this is just a daydream and it is discussed in day-dreamy terms. One day – someday – hopefully – if everything comes together – when my ship comes in – when the kids are gone to college – when I have more time – yada, yada, yada. Let face it, for the “average joe” it “ain’t gonna happen”. That’s why he / she is the “average joe”.
- for the successful person their vision is a destination that they are on the road to arriving at. They complement their vision by have props that continually keep their goal in sight. These are the people who plaster their office / work area with pictures of their dreams. They post encouraging quotes. They read about other successful people. They attempt to motivate others, because in doing so, they keep themselves motivated.
3. Do you have the needed “people skills”?
Successful people understand that “it ain’t about themselves”. Like Zig Ziglar says, “You can have anything in life that you want, if you will help enough other people get what they want”.
Its called the Law of Reciprocity. When you help someone else, this creates a desire in the other person to do something to help you and “even the score”. This desire is not an overt one – it is more of a subconscious emotion. But all successful people recognize that by helping others, you are helping yourself.
Look at all the successful people that you know. How do they interact with others. Do they stand around and wait for other people to “pay homage” to them? I doubt it.
- They are the people you see approaching with their hand out ready to firmly shake your hand.
- They look you in the eye and “lock” on to what you are saying.
- When they speak with you, you get the feeling that you are the most important person in the room.
- They “listen” actively, hear what you are saying and they understand.
- They follow-up. This says that you are important and it demonstrates your importance to them.
- They are open to intelligent input / ideas.
4. Do you think on paper?
This simple concept is probably the most important. All successful people take notes because they are not vain enough to think that they can remember everything. Making notes:
- keeps your eye on the ball – you stay focused on the important stuff and are not sidetracked by the immediate emergency
- allows you to record your ideas
- allows you to schedule your day
- keeps the project moving in the right direction
- allows for follow-up
Is this all that there is to being successful? No way, but it’s a start. If you have these characteristics, then you are on your way. If you don’t have these traits, then I suggest that you begin to acquire them – IF YOU DESIRE FINANCIAL SECURITY!
The potential of creating better habits
Daylle Deanna Schwartz doesn’t take any crap – not anymore. She decided to create better habits for herself and has parlayed that decision into a successful writing career. Her blog, lessons from a recovering doormat, is inspiring, motivating and empowering. If you need to kick-start your life, then take a look at some of her articles. You’ll probably want to buy one of her books as well.
Daylle tagged me to participate in her “Creating Better Habits” challenge. I am honored that she asked and the following is my contribution.
The Rut
A little over a year ago (Oct. 14. 2006, to be exact), I decided to create a better life for myself. It’s amazing how a pivotal date can stick in your mind, isn’t it? Don’t get me wrong, I had and still have a good life, but I was wallowing in the rut of a high-paying union job. Great pay, fantastic benefits, okay work, NO CHALLENGE – NO FULFILLMENT. Plants can’t live in a rut and neither will you – you die on the inside.
The “Aha” moment
My good friend, Scott Kay and I were discussing the then-recent purchase of Myspace for an amount in excess of half a billion dollars, when I asked Scott, “Why don’t we do something like that?” He responded, “Okay”. That moment will be burned in my mind forever, because it changed my life.
We had an idea
Scott and I came up with an idea for an internet business. The strange thing was that neither of us knew anything about the internet. In fact, I had only recently bought a computer and had not even been on the internet in over six years. I guess that we are “intelligently ignorant” as Zig Ziglar would call it. We are like the bumble bee who doesn’t know that he’s not supposed to be able to fly.
The changes
Having a life-altering thought is easy. Changing your life is not. It requires changing yourself, which is something that people naturally avoid. I began by creating better habits, like:
- changing my mind – I spend every spare minute reading. Internet technology, blogs, internet commerce, motivation, business, legal information, SEO, social networking, marketing, promotion, packaging, networking and much more – believe me, YOU CAN TEACH AN OLD DOG NEW TRICKS
- attempting new things – I had no idea how to create a web site or what a blog was, but I kept reading about how I needed one, so I started a blog on one of the free hosted platforms in order to get the feel of it. It felt good – Yes, I am addicted.
- avoiding negative people – when we started, it was all a big joke to the people that we worked with. We would hear comments like, “How’s that little internet thing coming along?” or “How’s that shoulder thing working out for you?” Now, it’s a different story, we are getting a lot of press and lot more orders. Now, people stop us and ask, “Are you selling stock in your company yet?” or “When you start hiring, remember me”.
- testing myself – it is amazing when you realize how much you can accomplish when you are passionate about something. Sleep is for sissies – at least that is what I keep telling myself. We’ve had so many orders for the Rotater lately that we don’t have the luxury to sleep. That is, if we expect to maintain excellent customer service. And we do!
- not taking “No” personally – some people don’t understand the concept of the Rotater or how it can help them. That’s not a problem for me, because those who reject it are in the minority and I know that it is not an indictment of me or my abilities. I just keep plugging along because I know that we are helping people regain their quality of life.
The result
I am tired, overworked, excited, stressed, stretched, learning, growing – and I absolutely love it. I am having the time of my life. How long will it last? As long as I am willing to maintain good habits.
Thanks
Thanks again, Daylle. I didn’t realize until I began, how much I needed to write this article. What a release.
Tag, your it
I would like to tag:
- Brad Baggett – my good friend and a phenomenal connector. He “knows” people and can put you in touch with people that can help you – a networker “par excellence”.
- Eric Sanders – another good friend with a sense of humor that is so similar to mine, that it is scary. Strong opinions and willing to share as well as defend them. A real “idea” man.
- Tristan Loo – I’ve read some of Tristan’s writings and have been impressed with his style and substance. Recently, I had the pleasure to read “Lucky You!”, an article that he had published in a sweet self-help magazine entitled GOING BONKERS. As usual, it was great.
- Stephen Hopson - a good friend and constant inspiration. He is one of the best networkers that I’ve had the pleasure of knowing
Tell us all how you’ve created better habits. Anyone who feel compelled to share, go to Daylle’s site and check out the rules and join the fun. The more the merrier.
Define success or excuse failure – it’s up to you
Everyone wants to be successful, but if you ask 100 people to define success, most of the time, 95–97 percent of those who answer, will give you extremely vague definitions. This isn’t unusual since studies have shown time and again that only about three to five percent of the population will take the time to define what success means to them. These select few will proceed to map out a goals program along with the a strategy for attaining their goals.
1. How do you define success?
Success is unique to you. How you define success is based on:
- your dreams
- your hopes
- your present situation
- your past experiences
- your knowledge
- your passion
- your drive to do or be
- your family situation
- your age
- your belief system
…and there are probably a host of other things that can and will influence your definition of success. The point is for you to begin to think about what you want. It is very important that you determine what you want as opposed to what others want for you.
Make notes when a thought “pops” into your head. Then, set aside a quiet time to go through your thoughts, taking into account your unique situation, and then develop a definition of success that suits you.
2. Develop a plan to achieve your definition of success.
Since your definition of success is unique to you and your situation, then your plan must be unique. Points to consider:
- do you need more education?
- is it formal or informal education? (do you need to return to school or do you need to do research?)
- is your spouse/family on board with your new goals? (if so, great. if not, how will you deal with the situation?)
- are you willing to devote the time needed to grow? (growth requires change – you can’t grow and stay the same)
- can you see problems? (how will/can you deal with them?)
- can you live in the minute? (what can you do “right now”, “this minute” to achieve your goals?”
- do you deserve success? (if you don’t feel that you deserve success, you will do things to sabotage yourself)
3. Excuses: our illogical reasons for lack of success
The first response to any program of personal growth and development is the production of a number of excuses as to why you can’t become successful. Here is a short list of often expressed excuses:
- I’m too old. Really? Grandma Moses was in her 80’s before she ever painted. Colonel Sanders was in his 60’s when he began trying to market his “original” recipe.
- I’m not smart enough. Really? The fact is that most people are within single digits of the vast majority of the world’s population when it comes to a measurement of intelligence. We tend to overestimate the intelligence of others while at the same time underestimating our own intelligence.
- I don’t know where to start. Really? You don’t have to know where to start, you just have to start. You determine where that is. Anywhere is okay, the point is to just begin, the way will reveal itself once you begin to look.
- I’m worried about what my friends and family will think. Really? If they really care about you, they will stand behind you. If they don’t support you, you have to wonder what their motives are. Are they jealous? When you succeed, what will that say about their efforts?
- I’m just not that kind of person. Really? What kind of person are you? The kind that is destined to fail? The fact is that most people are more alike than they are different. We all deserve success, but we each determine our own destiny. We are where we are today because of the choices we made yesterday. We made our choices based on our thoughts. Therefore, it stands to reason that if we can change the way we think, we can change our choices and thus change our future.
These are not valid excuses for you or anyone else because someone else has faced these same situations and they overcame them. If they can be overcome, then you can also overcome them.
- Get your mind right
- Accept responsibility for your life
- Define success
- Create a plan
- Commit to personal growth and development
- Develop your mind
- Realize that mediocrity is not acceptable and success is your right
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