Learn from your child - fear of failure results in lack of success

November 20, 2007 · Posted in Daughters, Entrepreneurship, Inspiration, Motivation 

 

Ask any person who is still in the consideration phase of becoming an entrepreneur, why they have yet to launch their business enterprise and you will hear a litany of excuses. When boiled down to the basics, the majority will admit that it is due to a fear of some sort:

  • fear of ridicule
  • fear of what others may think or say
  • fear of success
  • fear of the unknown
  • fear of failure

The flaw in the fear of failure – it is learned, not inherent

The list of fears can be endless, but the overwhelming majority will say that the number one reason for their inhibition is the fear of failure.

Have you ever stopped to consider where your fears originated? Were you born with them? The answer is no, with the exceptions being; the fear of falling, the fear of loud noises and in some people, the fear of snakes. All of our other fears are learned, ingrained and habitual.

Children are fearless

My daughter fell twelve feet out of our loft and onto a hardwood floor when she was only five. Fortunatley, she was only bruised badly. When things had settled, I asked her what had happened. She replied that she had been watching the “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” and had climbed on top of the railing that surrounds our loft/tv area, to sit like the hunchback was doing on tv.

As a child, we had no fears of failure. We tried to walk, we fell, made adjustments and then tried again and again and again. We kept trying and making adjustments until we found we could take one step and then two steps, all the while adapting and honing our technique.

This trial and error process allowed us to become proficient and we used the same techniques when we learned to ride a bike, swim, play sports or accomplish other feats both as a child and as an adult.

Those important to us supported our efforts

Our parents never shook their heads and said, “Poor Johnny, he’ll never walk”. They picked us up, dusted us off, gave us some encouragement and told us to give it another try. Failure is nothing to be ashamed of. We’ve all failed (no one ever learned to walk, swim and so forth, on the first try ).

As children, we never worried about failure until we reached an age when we became concerned that others would think we were inferior if we failed in our current quest. The truth is that everyone must first fail in order to learn how to succeed.

The point is to let you inner child run free. Think like a child. Experiment. Attempt new things. Spend less time occupied with what others think and more time on freeing your spirit and expanding your mind. Try. Fail. Learn. Try again. Succeed.

It’s not like I’m asking you to hold a snake.

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Comments

3 Responses to “Learn from your child - fear of failure results in lack of success”

  1. Stephen Hopson on November 20th, 2007 4:20 pm

    And you should add fear of using a credit card or taking out a loan to start a business, which puts the person even deeper into debt. Some people are so debt averse (perhaps they had a bad experience in the past??), they’re afraid to take a chance that way.

    Great post!

  2. Brad Baggett on November 20th, 2007 9:43 pm

    Fear is such a crippling phenomenon that none of us really have to tolerate. I love your point about how we are not born with fear; it is a response that we learn.

    http://www.JuiceofChampions.com

    http://juiceofchampions.com/home/lessons-from-a-child

  3. Chris Melton on November 21st, 2007 2:20 am

    Stephen - you’re right, some don’t understand that you can use credit or allow it to use you. Sometimes credit is a good thing. Thanks for your input.

    Brad - isn’t amazing that when we grow, we become less afraid?

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